7.28.2014

Baby Anger Management

One of my favorite friends (out of the four that I have) came to visit last week.
Lisa is super lame because she moved to South Dakota and had a baby boy. We totally could have been boy-momming together, but apparently her husband is more important than play dates with me.

Get your priorities straight Lisa.

Let me start out by saying how proud I was of Titty Monkey Tyler's development. He is about 4 1/2 months and started rolling over. I don't really know the approximate age babies start rolling, but since he is my kid, I was pretty smug about his abilities.
Also let me just state that normally my kids are perfect and behave like happy little angels....


Anyway, Lisa brought Baby Caleb out to California for the first time. I have been wanting to see him since he was born in February.
He was born Feb. 14, so he is about 2 1/2 weeks older than Tyler.

First of all, Lisa looked all hot after having a baby a few months ago. What a ho.
I look like a tired, sweaty rat and she looked fresh and pretty. Great.

Baby Caleb slept like an angel for 1/2 an hour after she brought him in.
Then he woke up sweetly and had smiles for everyone.
During his cute smiling, Cryin' Ryan was running around desperate for Lisa's attention and Tyler was pooping his pants. Great Again.

Lisa laid Caleb down on his monogrammed blanket. The little punk rolled over and quickly got up on his hands and knees.


So much for being proud of Tyler's nervous, wobbly roll overs.

So as Baby Caleb is being happy and laughing, my kids were acting a fool.
Titty monkey cried the entire time. Ryan was showing off his 3 year old ninja moves and peeing his pants.

Then Caleb had the nerve to lay by my entitled baby and continue to be giggly and sweet.



I don't even want to think about the fact that he happily drank a room temperature bottle. 

If there is one thing I love, it's when other people's kids are clearly well behaved and mine act like caged animals.
I am honestly surprised Ryan didn't bite anyone. 



Lisa swore that Caleb is not a happy adorable baby all the time. I hesitate to believe her.
I think she was just trying to make me feel better. 


What would make me feel better is if there was a Baby Anger Management class offered at our community center.

P.S. Yesterday, Ryan got kicked out of his church nursery class. Twice.