Drug Caching

There is a huge unoccupied ravine across the street from my house.

We always see local teenagers sneaking up there for a little make out session, which is why Jared and I weren't too surprised when we saw a beat-down sedan pull up near our house.

Don't worry, I still stopped everything to spy on the mangy looking girl that was driving.

Life as a mostly stay at home mom doesn't get too exciting, so I take what I get.

She was alone and sat in her rusty car for almost 5 minutes messing with her phone and something in her purse.
She finally climbed out with the grace of drunkard.

The girl looked like she was in her early twenties, and wore shorts short enough that I could confirm she was, in fact, female.

She scuffled over to the fence and cautiously looked around to see if anyone was watching her.

I creepily hid by my kitchen window.

She pulled something out of one of the fence posts.
I totally thought she was making a drug drop. I was stoked.

After gross-girl left, I put my pants on and went across the street to check things out.

Inside the fence post was a little metal vial.

I excitedly opened it up:

 

A geo-cache.

 

BORING.

I was so bummed. I thought I would for sure get to solve a crime and call the cops.

Clearly, I need to create more excitement in my life that doesn't involve spying out my window without pants on.

Dirty Thirty

Last month, I turned 30.
That's right. The dirty thirty.

I spent that weekend with my hot husband, my energetic/psycho two year old, my newborn baby and my awesome parents who were in town from Utah.

My dad even flew in a couple of days early to be there on my actual birthday. When you are the
favorite child, you get perks like that.

We did a bunch of cool stuff that I am too lazy to write about, but trust me, it was cool.

I took some time to reflect on my 30 years of life and where I thought I would be at this point. I have accomplished all major goals I set for myself except one:


I still haven't come to terms with the fact that I was not born black.


I know in my heart there is an inner black girl aching to come out and be FABULOUS. That's why I still sing along in my car to Tupac and 50 Cent with my babies in the back seat.

That is also why I binge-watch the Real Housewives of Atlanta.

I wish someone asked me to prom like this :(

Other than that, there is nothing so seriously wrong with my life that a little Botox, Spanx, and a lot of praying can't fix.


My husband asked me what I wanted it to say on my cake.

I was breast feeding #2 at the time and jokingly told Jared to have the bakery write, "Happy Birthday Milk Tits".

 

Thanks Jared.

 

This picture will be awesome in our scrapbook and I can't wait to explain it to our children!

Maternity Dressing Tips

If I could dispense one piece of advice regarding dressing while you're knocked up, it would be this:

Suck it up and buy a couple pairs of good maternity jeans - especially if your planning on  having more than one kid. Its going to be expensive, but how your pregnant butt looks is worth investing in.

They are more comfortable, keep their shape better and last longer than cheap ones.

They are also awesome to wear for a few months/years after you have the baby and are getting back into shape.

Maxi dresses? Yes.

Wrap dresses? Yes.

I tried to buy shirts and dresses that can be worn whether you're knocked up or not. This shirt is going to be an amazing swimsuit cover up this summer.

Never underestimate the power of a plain T-shirt, jeans and cute cardigan. Who cares if you can't button it up?

The best accessory is a smile. Lucky for me, I have a trouble-making 2 year that makes me smile all the time.