Daniel is not someone known for his brilliance and social tact. He is more known for his kindness, his Napoleon Dynamite inspired dancing (particularly at my wedding), and for his trust in other human beings.
As children, I instigated most of the deviance in our house. Daniel was an unfortunate victim of many of my pranks. I exploited his trust and gullibility on a daily basis. For instance:
- When Tons-of-Fun was about 5 years old, I convinced him that from now on we all have to poop out of our heads. I put my head towards the toilet bowl to demonstrate. "You still have to pull your pants down" I explained, knowing that Dan had utmost confidence in my authority of all things poop-related. Next time he had to go #2, he followed instructions perfectly. He promptly immersed his head in toilet water and dumped on the floor. I went and told my mom.
- Dan-the-man also has really light blond eyebrows. After a serious discussion on how girls don't like boys without eyebrows, he agreed to let me dye his. The only problem was that I used the leftovers from my purple hair dye. He walked around in shame being called "Barney" by the rest of the family for weeks.
Regardless of past gullibility, Daniel is a good and fun guy. I am stoked he is coming home safe and look forward to future shenanigans.
Dear Tons-of-fun,
I cant wait for your wedding....
Expect much worse than a Napoleon Dance.
Love,
emily
Amen.
