I Love Things

"The best things in life aren't things."

This clever play on the original quote, "The best things in life are free", was scratched into the paint on a bathroom stall at Cal State University. Mid-pee, I was forced to contemplate my relationship with material goods. The person/philosopher who wrote this had obviously:

A) been extremely bored while going #1 or #2
been inspired by the "for a good time call XXX-2959" message written below it
C) come to the profound conclusion that tangible objects are not what makes life worth living.

Apparently this person has never been to Costco.

A few of my favorite:

The Swiffer
This little beauty sweeps up the stuff your broom leaves behind.

And the little sweeper things are disposable. I am all about reducing waste, but not when throwing it away is so convenient. Available in bulk at Costco.

My iPod
Many a plane rides and sessions at the gym would be ruined if it wasn't for my iPod. I can listen to 8 gigs of music while ignoring those around me. If someone tries to talk to me, I can politely refuse by pointing to my headphones and mouthing the words, "Sorry! I cant hear you!", making my anti-social behavior slightly more acceptable. (Also a Costco purchase.)

Where else am I going to see all the cool kids from high school who are now overweight and paroled? Do not tell me that you don't feel giddy when someone from your past, fails at life.

Hot Dog and Drink for $1.50
Also available at your local Costco.

Pink Lip gloss
I would die without it. Sadly, not available at Costco or any Farmers Market.......yet.

My House
Even though it is old and still boasts the cross from the nuns that used to live here, I am stoked that I don't have to live in anyone's basement anymore.

Pen and Moleskin Notepads
How else would I fill up time while sitting in class and church. I need a creative outlet. It just so happens to be that my outlet involves drawing naughty pictures and showing them to the people around me.

Adult Acne Topical Cream
Is an explanation really needed? Without it, I look like I am an angst filled 14 year old who does not yet know the value of washing your face.

Lets all take this day to forget what is really important and ponder all the material possessions that make our life worth living.

1 comment:

  1. A while ago you left a comment on one of my blog posts and I'm just now getting back to thanking you. Your blog is hilarious and you have a unique voice. Costco is salvation....can I come sit next to you at the next block painting super saturday?


Speak with your heart or your private parts, either one is fine with me.