Hot or Not.com: A Love Story

I have a confession.

Jared and I met on the internet.

It's true. While most of our close friends and family are now privy to this information, it was kept under wraps for a few years after we met.
Back in 2004, meeting people on the internet was considered taboo (at least within my social circle) and strictly reserved for 14 year old girls and pedophiles.
So, we kept our relationship's origins a secret. We were so embarrassed that we didn't even tell my parents.
Only Jared's roommates and 2 of my closest friends knew. And my 2 friends were also my bridesmaids and threatened to expose us during their toasts at my reception. Instead they gave a witty toast alluding to it without giving us away.

Without further explanation -
Hot or Not.com: A Love Story

Once upon a time my brother Jake and I decided to play Hotornot.com. After making fun of people and rating their pictures for an undisclosed amount of time, I decided to create my own account....

We took a picture of me in my pajamas when I just woke up after a pretty rough night. It looked like this:

After a week the verdict was in. On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being the hottest, the hot or not community thought I was a 9.4. oh yes, you read that right. 9.4.
Another element of hot or not includes a profile where you can write about yourself and email other people. My profile read something like this:

I am failing math 1010 for the second time at the University of Utah. I enjoy humming Mormon children's songs, snowboarding better than you and playing naked twister. Please contact me if you will tutor me in Math for free. I work at a blood lab and don't have much money because I just bought a snowboard pass. P.S. I have a bad attitude.

Before long I was offered free tutoring from a dude with a handsome profile pic. of him in a speedo, cowboy hat and leather vest. sexy.

Jared offered free math tutoring.... but we we ended up just making out in the hot tub. I failed math that semester.

What began as an embarrassing internet love match soon blossomed into weekly make-out sessions, which then turned into engagement and then marriage and lobster underpants on our wedding night. Precious!

Tomorrow is our 6 year anniversary. amen.

This picture of Jared has nothing to do with this post, he is just being manly and carrying a tree.


  1. You left out the part of this story where you wanted to switch Jareds. You are lucky I wouldn't let you or you would be married to The Burp Swallower. Ewww.

    And PS responding to online advances from men in speedos never turns out well. Please don't ever try this again.

  2. Kris & I met on yahoo personals!


Speak with your heart or your private parts, either one is fine with me.