Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Ugly Fighting

Some days I wake up, look in the mirror, shake my head in disappointment, and thank heaven that beauty products exists.

When I need to not look ugly, I use my arsenal of effective, ugly-fighting products.

If I was rude enough to post a "before" picture of myself, you would definitely be wondering what magical products I use. Here are some of my favorites:

 
 Clear Eyes Red Eye Relief Eye-drops
When I stay up too late watching Gypsy Sisters, I can count on these eye-drops to make me look refreshed and bright-eyed. No matter how awesome your make-up and outfit are, if you look stoned and bleary-eyed you will look like white trash.



 
Crest Whitening Strips
Next to eye-drops, this is the most essential beauty product. You can't strut around with popcorn kernels for teeth. White teeth make you look instantly younger and it will be less likely that people will mistake you for a Russian Hooker. Trust me on this one.




Bath and Body Works Super Rich Body Cream


This is the thickest, creamiest  most luxurious lotion I have ever used. I keep a few tubes in my emergency 72 hour kit. I don't want to be caught with dry skin in any situation.


Make up forever - Super Lip Gloss


it's thick, sticky and tasteless. Just how I like goop that squirts on my mouth.


Bare Minerals 


When I wake up and my skin is breaking out (which is everyday for the past 9 years....) I cake this stuff on. Other concealers and foundations only highlight my teenage acne. This stuff actually conceals it.... mostly.


Fresh - Black Tea Instant Perfecting Mask


It's a little pricy but since I have a friend who gets me a Sephora discount, so I can totally splurge. This mask is so refreshing and makes my skin look a little bit less crappy.

I love beauty products so much I think I'm going to draw them with little hearts on my 
notebook.


2 comments:

  1. "thick, sticky and tasteless. Just how I like goop that squirts on my mouth."
    you are such a slut.
    no wonder jared married you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. /\ hahaha that comment just made me die laughing!!

    ReplyDelete

Speak with your heart or your private parts, either one is fine with me.

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