9.11.2013

Types of Pregnant Girls: Part II of III

Read Part I here.

The Glowing Pregnant Girl


The more pregnant she gets, the prettier she looks.
Instead of people helping her, she does service for other people.
Glows even though she's not wearing bronzer.
Her house is spotless.
She gets dressed everyday.
Has a very nice pinterest board collection.
Pregnancy is bliss for her.
I secretly hate her.
She probably made her own custom crib bedding.
Se still makes her family dinner every night.
Craves healthy sensible food and world peace.



The Smug Amateur




Thinks she is righteous and inspirational just for having a kid.
Acts like she is the first person in the world to ever be pregnant and is better than you because of it.
Her baby's kicks are WAY stronger than your baby's kicks.
Lower than average I.Q.
Thinks that because she read a couple books on pregnancy, that she is a seasoned pro.
She loves to give unsolicited advice and recommendations.
Mistakenly believes she is a glowing.
Start fights with everyone because she is classy.
Imagines other people find her adorable, hehehehehe!
She probably blogs things like: "My friend, Abbie, really wants a baby... I tend to do that to people!" - As if her friend never wanted kids until she met the inspirational Smug Amateur.
Craves root beer and validation.



The Extremely Excited Preparer

Buys a stroller and car seat the week of the positive pregnancy test.
Has been a nanny and worked with kids for years.
Knows more about babies than most moms do.
Sucks for moving to South Dakota.
Probably has her hospital bag packed by month 3.
Is organized beyond belief.
Is so ridiculously excited for the baby, she can barely sleep at night.
Baby's nursery is ready by month 5.
Craves McDonald's and large bags of Sour Patch Kids.




Read Part III here.






1 comment:

  1. Hmmm, could you possibly be related to The Smug Amateur? lol!

    ReplyDelete

Speak with your heart or your private parts, either one is fine with me.