10 Things: Guilty

In the past couple of weeks I have been guilty of the following:

1. I put three dirty dishes in the dishwasher, which was full of clean dishes..... then I restarted the dishwasher because I was too lazy to empty it and/or hand wash my 3 dishes.

2. Actively trying to make Fegalicious cry even though her brain doesn't function on an human adult level. I suspect that teasing her is similar to teasing a angry squirrel.

3. I waste approximately 8-10 butt-wipes every time I change Ryan's poo diapers. I am deathly scared of getting any of his logs on my hands.

4. I looked at a huge mess Ryan made and thought "Someone should really clean that". Then I went to the park instead.

5. I wrote things down on my To Do list even though I had already done them. I wanted to cross them out so I would feel more productive.

6. One day I slept in until 9:00am and let my hyperactive two year old run around the house with no supervision. When I got out of bed there were 6 tomatoes smashed on my couch, saturating my white pillows and ground into the carpet............ totally worth it.

7. I tempted fate by driving around on an empty fuel tank. I was too lazy to stop for gas.

8. I went on another binge reading kick. Who knew there were so many cool books about polygamy?

9. I was neglecting my sunscreen responsibilities and I noticed that my Dirty Sanchez is trying to reappear. Damn you sunny California.

10. I was on a bug-hunt with Cryin Ryan and couldn't find any insects. I was bored and hot so I just put a crumpled leaf in his jar and told him it was a spider. He was excited.

I am not very proud of this list.


  1. We all do things.....how many countless hours have you kids spent trying to put salt on a birds tail so you could catch it? My grandma was a genius! Kept me busy for a lot of my own childhood. Sometimes moms need a break! And if putting a leaf in a jar produces a smile that big, then you aren't all that bad!
    And I just think you found a funny angry squirrel picture and needed an excuse to use it!

  2. This post is awesome. I need to start using 10 wipes per poo because the other day I was grocery shopping and thought I accidentally got some mustard on me from the cart, nope it was baby poop from my kids poo like an hour earlier. Classy.

  3. hahahahhahahahahaaha
    cant stop laughing
    why do you have the nicest mom ever
    you are mostly evil

    1. ......and it must be a weird gene thing on their dads side. Her brother is just like her. That's why we support Emily living in a different state. All %$#@ breaks loose when they get together!

  4. Ha! My aunt Heidi always does #5. She said she started doing that when she realized at the end of yet another crazy-busy-on-the-go-all-day day that she had been working from sun-up to sun-down yet couldn't cross a single thing off her to-do list. That night, she satrted a "Did" list and felt much better. :)

    I'm sure you're a great mama. Your kiddo's adorable too. :)

  5. I do the dishwasher thing all the time..... And I use too many wipes.

    Number 10 has me laughing out loud. His face!


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